Ow, my head
I see redBecause of Kim, I bled
And now of this whole charade?
I am FED!
As in fed all the ‘F’ up of all this paparazzi/Kardashian crap!
Get me the hell outta here!!!!
[via TheSuperficial]If you haven’t seen the feel good viral video of the weekend yet, here’s Kanye West banging his head off a street sign while trying to walk into a restaurant like a badass while Kim Kardashian waddles in front of him carrying the child he can’t wait to be nothing but a paycheck to. Even better is when Kanye comes back out and decides to throw a goddamn hissy fit because clearly it’s the paparazzi’s fault for making him believe depth perception is for punk bitches. Then again, they probably put that bright red sign there as trap. It’s practically a ninja.[Read More - Click HERE To See The Video!]
1. trump Northern to midlands slang for a fart.
Jon Stewart has a lot of fans — but Donald Trump is not one of them. After a bit of back-and-forth between the two, beginning with a tweet from the real estate tycoon and culminating in a joke at his expense during theDaily Show on Wednesday, May 1, Trump again took to Twitter to voice his less-than-favorable opinions of the comedian.
“If Jon Stewart is so above it all & legit, why did he change his name from Jonathan Leibowitz? He should be proud of his heritage!” the Celebrity Apprentice boss wrote on Friday, May 3.
What’s your name
You phony Steward
Hiding behind the false names
On other hand
I am proud of mine
It trumps over any other
I am an old fart
I do not know why I like the drugs
But I like it more than my baby’s hugs
I do not care if I’m of drugs
I will sip it from jugs
And carelessly shrug
Until I am stoned like a squashed slug
A dead bug
On a rug
So Denise, you can keep…
My baby’s hugs!
[via DailyMail]Brooke Mueller ‘refusing’ to go to rehab for drug addiction after Denise Richards is awarded temporary custody of her twins ~By Alison Moodie
Brooke Mueller is refusing to seek professional help for her drug addiction despite losing custody of her young sons with Charlie Sheen on Thursday night out of fear that her drug use is jeopardising their safety.
Sheen’s other ex-wife Denise Richards is to take on the care of twins Bob and Max, four, after social workers from the Los Angeles County Department of Children and Family Services removed them from the home of their mother Brooke because of allegations her drug use is putting them in harm’s way.
But the 35-year-old is said to be in denial about the severity of her drug addiction, a source told RadarOnline.
Not as easy as it used to be
The way that the music comes to me
I will be rockin’ till my grave
For if its my music that you crave
Stand strong and be brave
My age might be a little scary
But there is no need for you to be wary
I will be rocking for years to come
My soul defies the young
It’s only my terrifying visage…
Which shows any noticeable slippage!
When you’re an Oscar winner and you’re making millions of dollars for every movie, the idea of living on only $1.50 a day probably seems impossible. But that’s not stopping Ben Affleck, who has signed up to take the Live Below the Line challenge next week.
That’s right, for at least one full day, the big star will keep his food and drink costs below what many pay for just a 12-ounce can of soda. And it’s all for a very good cause — he’ll be raising awareness and funds relating to extreme poverty for The Global Poverty Project.
We’re expecting to see the 40-year-old, as well as his counterparts, tweeting their experiences, as well as what they’re eating and drinking, throughout next week on their personal accounts, as well as @LBLUS.
For one full day
Ben has to give his privilege away
For one full day
He has to play
A poverty stricken man
Will have to eat his ramen noodles
Lets pray that
This will never ever happened again
Kissing a prince is what all little girls dream of, right? Maybe not.
On Thursday, a 4-year-old Scottish girl ducked out of the way when Prince William swooped in to give her a kiss during a two-day visit to Scotland where he and Kate visited local residents. While saying hello to the girl who was waving a flower around, Prince William asks her, “Is that for me? Is that for Katie? Yeah, you can give it to her.” Then he adds, “You look very pretty. Do you want a kiss?”
As the crowd gives a collective “Aw…” Prince William leans in only to have the little girl squirm away. “Oh no!” says Prince William. “See? Next time, sugar, next time,” he says.
Every girl dreams to kiss a prince
What will convince this little girl
Not to wince
And reject a kiss from the prince
I think she got her fairy tales wrong
When you kiss the prince
You don’t became a frog
Better not to know!
Watch the video. It is hilarious.
He may be covered in sequins on Dancing With the Stars, but Sean Lowe isn’t as high maintenance as TMZwants its readers to believe. On March 24, the website claimed the reigningBachelor demanded to be filmed from certain angles, talked down to crew members and bragged to his fellow competitors, “This show needs me!”
I like to dance
Cha cha cha
Jive and foxtrot
Tango and bosanova
I can dance them all
But I am not a diva
Just a guy in sequins
Who can bust a move
But be sure to film my right profile
Or I will step hard on your toes
The History Channel miniseries “The Bible” made headlines on Sunday – but not for its huge ratings.
Some on Twitter said actor Mohamen Mehdi Ouazanni – who plays Satan on the miniseries – resembled President Barack Obama, something the producers do not agree with.”This is utter nonsense. The actor who played Satan, Mehdi [Ouazaani], is a highly acclaimed Moroccan actor. He has previously played parts in several Biblical epics – including Satanic characters long before Barack Obama was elected as our President,” Executive Producers Mark Burnett and Roma Downey said in a statement.
In the eyes of beholder
Virgin Mary is on the boulder
Jesus on the candle holder
Obama is Satan on the TV
An evil personified
An arch enemy of God
With black hood and black skin
Deceiver of the humanity
People see what they want to see
We will never agree on this insanity
Some see Satan
Some see Obama
TMZ reported: ‘Sources say there’s evidence Wayne went on a Sizzurp binge after being released Wednesday, because doctors found high amounts of codeine in his system.’
This is not the first time the singer has suffered from seizures.
Back in October, Wayne was onboard a flight from Texas to LAX when he started to convulse.
The flight was immediately diverted to Louisiana where he was admitted to hospital.
Party, party hard
Get you guard
Lets get high
Take a sizzurp
Have your seizures
Non stop non stop
Until you drop
You stupid stupid guy
Not so happy families: Kris’ uncle revealed that he thought Kim’ mum, Kris Jenner, was an ‘evil mastermind’
An evil mastermind
Working from behind the door
Sends her daughters
To steal money, diamonds and souls
More, more, more
Rotten to the core
The material wealth is all
She ever asks for
Her looks are deceiving
Her smile is full of gore
Her evil empire is starting
To self destroy
Happy to be free
Life without that lunatic
Is everything I dreamt to be
While he still lives in the bubble
Getting in trouble after trouble
I am beaming with the glee
Happy to be free
“She seems like a demon,” Handler said of Jolie, 36. “It has nothing to do with Jennifer. As a woman, I know when you see somebody walking across the room that’s a bad girl. I just don’t like Angelina Jolie. I don’t think she’s a girl’s girl. I like girl’s girls!”
Long before she became best friends withJennifer Aniston,Chelsea Handlermade headlines for publicly bashingAngelina Jolie. During a March 5 appearance on Bravo’s Watch What Happens Live, the 38-year-old Chelsea Latelyhost continued to dis the engaged mother of six.
Oh, the green monster opened her mouth
It looks like somebody got rejected as a friend
Long time ago
Admit it honey
In a heart beat you would jump the boat
Cross the street
If you were asked to be best friend forever
With the demon
Taylor Swift dishes out plenty of jibes to ex lovers, but it seems she has a rather thin skin herself.
The country singer has hit back at comedians Tina Fey and Amy Poehler for mocking her love life at Hollywood’s Golden Globe Awards this year.
She branded the jab sexist in an interview with magazine Vanity Fair on Tuesday, and suggested the pair will go to ‘hell’ for the comment.
During the awards broadcast, hosts Fey and Poehler threw a barb at the singer, telling her to ‘stay away’ from actor Michael J. Fox’s 23-year-old son.
They are going to hell
How do they dare
To joke about me
Like I am Adele
Who doesn’t care
I was never ever
Clingy and insane
Why would they entertain
Taking about my pain
Say a prayer
You will never ever joke again
You are going to hell
Justin also wanted fans to know that he did have a great birthday even though the club was ‘weak’ and despite the star tweeting that he had a bad birthday.
I am a lonely boy
I can hear the clock
The fame is ticking off
I thought they would love me forever
Only their forever was actually a never
I am left down
Like a sack of old potatoes
Like a sad clown
My time is running off
The 37-year-old showed off his tatted arms – and moobs – as he performed in a fitted vest and flashy red pants that hung below his bottom.
Bling Bling Bling
Red is my thing
Tattoos on my arms
Are my lucky charms
I wish no harms
You can see my gut
My pants are down my butt
Rick Ross Rick Ross
I am da boss
I live in my flashy red hut