at&t you suck Aside

Since I have started this blog back in March 2010, my intent was to post everyday, all those things I find newsworthy, quirky and just downright odd-interesting.In other words all those items, news stories most other blogs ignore.

However…

Due to AT&T’s change of bandwidth policies, doing away with unlimited packages the way that they did?

They sure are making it had on my pocketbook lately.

And because they are?

Anguished Repose might have to become an every-other-day event.

Just wanted to give Anguished fans a heads-up, when it comes to our new posting schedule. AR is not going anywhere, we will just be posting in a way that my pocketbook will no longer hate me for. And the past couple of months? Oh, the hate has been fierce!

Ugh.

I hate this, I do, but we do what we gotta do to keep the peace, eh?

So in the meantime, until I win the lottery and no longer have to stress over bills…

Guess I will see you every-other-day!

Yours Sincerely & Always,
Anguished Repose

AT&T is full of a bunch of bandwidth Nazis!

BOSS Gifs – The World’s Largest Rope Swing, Edition!

Our inner child is always on the prowl to find something daring to do.

Thank you, Devine Graham, for making my inner child happy.

[Source]

 Big kid Devin Graham continues his ongoing series of childhood upgrades (previouslyandalso) with the installation of the world’s largest rope swing. Shot in Moab, Utah on a number of fancy cameras.

This is how you swing…

Like a BOSS!

Ben The Bachelor

Poetic Celebrity Parody – My Wedding Vows, Edition!

via [Daily mail] Ben Flajnik may have been smitten with Courtney Robertson’s heartfelt faux wedding vows on Monday’s episode ofThe Bachelor, but little did he know, those words had been spoken previously…by none other than Sex and the City’s Sarah Jessica Parker! [Read More]

Here at the AR we found out what Miss. Courtney’s really wanted to say as her wedding vows.

Enjoy them.

They are equally lovely as the one she stole from Miss. Carrie Bradshaw.

You are my meal ticket
My stepping stone
I wouldn’t look for someone so lame
If you didn’t bring me the fame
I am here to lie and play the game
I am openly wicked and will take aim
At every other woman that enters the frame
My love is real love
I truly love myself and nobody else
You are mine
My husband
Don’t you dare breaking our vows
I said words from my heart|
Till death us apart!!!

[Source]

at one time

News Mash: It’s a blast of the past, for both Mother Nature and man!

Ah…

The wonders of Mother Nature & our introduction to it.

Sometimes, rarely yet miraculously?

Everything old, can one day…

Be new again!

[via Gizmodo] Extraordinary 298-Million-Year-Old Forest Discovered Under Chinese Coal Mine

American and Chinese scientists are flabbergasted after discovering a giant 298-million-year-old forest buried intact under a coal mine near Wuda, in Inner Mongolia, China.

They are calling it the Pompeii of the Permian period because, like the ancient Roman city, it was covered and preserved by volcanic ash.

Like Pompeii, this swamp forest is so perfectly maintained that scientists know where every plant originally was. This has allowed them to map it and to create the images above. This extraordinary finding “is like Pompeii”, according to University of Pennsylvania paleobotanist Hermann Pfefferkorn, who characterized it as “a time capsule.”

It’s marvelously preserved. We can stand there and find a branch with the leaves attached, and then we find the next branch and the next branch and the next branch. And then we find the stump from the same tree. That’s really exciting.

[Read More]

It all can be ours to enjoy…

To savor and?

Marvel at.

For the wonders of Mother Nature’s creations?

Are never truly gone…

Forever.

[via NYTimes]Living plants have been generated from the fruit of a little arctic flower, the narrow-leafed campion, that died 32,000 years ago, a team of Russian scientists reports.

The fruit was stored by an arctic ground squirrel in its burrow on the tundra of northeastern Siberia and lay permanently frozen until excavated by scientists a few years ago.

This would be the oldest plant by far that has ever been grown from ancient tissue.

The present record is held by a date palm grown from a seed some 2,000 years old that was recovered from the ancient fortress of Masada in Israel.

Seeds and certain cells can last a long term under the right conditions, but many claims of extreme longevity have failed on closer examination, and biologists are likely to greet this claim, too, with reserve until it can be independently confirmed.

Tales of wheat grown from seeds in the tombs of the pharaohs have long been discredited. Lupines were germinated from seeds in a 10,000-year-old lemming burrow found by a gold miner in the Yukon.

But the seeds, later dated by the radiocarbon method, turned out to be modern contaminants.

Despite this unpromising background, the new claim is supported by a firm radiocarbon date.  [Read More]

While man’s creations…

Remain, seemingly just as enduring.

But?

Are a lot LESS to be marveled at…

[via BoingBoingDirty words of 1811 ~By 

On Project Gutenberg, the 1811 edition of Francis Grose’s “Dictionary in the Vulgar Tongue,” a compleat look at all the dirty cussin’ of the early 1800s. It was produced by Juliet Sutherland, Charles Franks and the Online Distributed Proofreading Team, who clearly have admirably filthy minds. Some of my favorites:

ACCOUNTS. To cast up one’s accounts; to vomit.

ADMIRAL OF THE NARROW SEAS. One who from drunkenness vomits into the lap of the person sitting opposite to him. SEA PHRASE.

AMBASSADOR OF MOROCCO. A Shoemaker. (See Mrs. Clarke’s Examination.)

APE LEADER. An old maid; their punishment after death, for neglecting increase and multiply, will be, it is said, leading apes in hell.

 [See more outrageous adverts from our past!]

APPLE DUMPLIN SHOP. A woman’s bosom.

APPLE-PYE BED. A bed made apple-pye fashion, like what is called a turnover apple-pye, where the sheets are so doubled as to prevent any one from getting at his length between them: a common trick played by frolicsome country lasses on their sweethearts, male relations, or visitors.

ATHANASIAN WENCH, or QUICUNQUE VULT. A forward girl, ready to oblige every man that shall ask her.

BAG OF NAILS. He squints like a bag of nails; i. e. his eyes are directed as many ways as the points of a bag of nails. The old BAG OF NAILS at Pimlico; originally the BACCHANALS.

BAYARD OF TEN TOES. To ride bayard of ten toes, is to walk on foot. Bayard was a horse famous in old romances,

BLANKET HORNPIPE. The amorous congress.

BODY OF DIVINITY BOUND IN BLACK CALF. A parson.

BORN UNDER A THREEPENNY HALFPENNY PLANET, NEVER TO BE WORTH A GROAT. Said of any person remarkably unsuccessful in his attempts or profession.

TO BOX THE JESUIT, AND GET COCK ROACHES. A sea term for masturbation; a crime, it is said, much practised by the reverend fathers of that society.

BUTTOCK AND TONGUE. A scolding wife.

CHOAKING PYE, or COLD PYE, A punishment inflicted on any person sleeping in company: it consists in wrapping up cotton in a case or tube of paper, setting it on fire, and directing the smoke up the nostrils of the sleeper. See HOWELL’S COTGRAVE.

CHRISTMAS COMPLIMENTS. A cough, kibed heels, and a snotty nose.

COFFEE HOUSE. A necessary house. To make a coffee-house of a woman’s ****; to go in and out and spend nothing.

COLD PIG. To give cold pig is a punishment inflicted on sluggards who lie too long in bed: it consists in pulling off all the bed clothes from them, and throwing cold water upon them.

CORPORAL. To mount a corporal and four; to be guilty of onanism: the thumb is the corporal, the four fingers the privates.

And that’s just up to C. (see also: The Internet was made for cussin’) [Read More]

Far more?

Along the line to be continuously embarrassed by…

And perpetually forever freakin’ ever.

olivia evil

News Mash: Be it goblins, or Olivia Newton-John, some forms of evil are just scary!

The insidiousness nature of evil?

It’s so very simple.

Because you see…

It can come in so very many horrible, horrible forms.

[via Daily Mail] Female pupils have been sent home from a school in Zimbabwe after they told their teachers they had been attacked by goblins, it has emerged.

Education officials have launched an investigation into claims small creatures repeatedly terrorised students at the council-run St Sebastian School near the southern city of Bulawayo.

The Bulawayo Chronicle reported that the tiny beasts appeared before the frightened girls as humans before turning into baboons.

A parent told the newspaper one girl fell into a trance after being possessed by the goblins.

The parent, who declined to be named, said: ‘I think that the pupil was possessed by demons.

‘She fell into a trance and then all of a sudden she started screaming and kicking into the air vigorously for about five minutes.

‘She did not say anything during the fit.

‘When she recovered, she said she had seen a baboon trying to slap her.’

The Bulawayo Chronicle reported that the girls believed the goblins were only visible to their victims.[Read More]

Where some forms of evil?

Are so very much more frightening…

Than all others?

Combined!

[via ABC News Go] Prosecutors urged jurors Tuesday to dismiss a murder defendant’s assertions that an angel who looked like Olivia Newton-John ordered him to fatally shoot a co-worker’s husband outside a preschool. They say Hemy Neuman was not delusional or insane and had planned the killing for months.

Neuman fell so hopelessly in love with Andrea Sneiderman, whom he supervised at General Electric, that he believed he was the father of her two children and that the only way to protect them was to kill Russell Sneiderman in November 2010, Neuman’s attorney Doug Peters said during opening arguments.

“He thought Sophia and Ian were his children and that Rusty Sneiderman was a danger to them,” said Peters, who contends his client is not guilty by reason of insanity because he couldn’t tell the difference between right and wrong at the time of the killing.

Neuman believed an angel told him to pull the trigger, said Peters, who didn’t give many details about the vision. He said only that Neuman told mental health experts that he killed Sneiderman “because that’s what the angel told him to do.”

Prosecutors, though, urged jurors to reject the insanity claim, arguing the 49-year-old Neuman meticulously planned the killing so he could be with Andrea Sneiderman. Prosecutors said Neuman will also claim he was visited by a demon who sounded like Barry White. [Read More]

Damn you, Olivia Newton-John, I say.

Just…

Damn. YOU!

*shakes head sadly*

there is just no saving some people

News Mash: Though a vaccine is in the works for Hep C, there remains no cure for stupidity!

As if the thought of nuclear war wasn’t scary enough…

Now?

The world has to contend with a deadly Hep C epidemic.

One that destroys the health and lives of anyone unlucky enough to contract it!

[via Philadelphia CBSLocal]PHILADELPHIA (CBS) — A new study indicates that one in every 33 baby boomers has the Hepatitis C virus, and many don’t even know they have this liver destroying disease.

Federal health officials say Hepatitis C is now killing more people than the AIDS virus, and most are over 45 years of age.

Dr. Robert Bettiker, associate professor of medicine in infectious diseases at Temple

University School of Medicine, says that once symptoms appear, the liver is already damaged.

He says the major symptoms include “pain in the right upper quadrant (of your abdomen) that goes on for days or months. Your eyes might turn yellow, you might start bleeding a lot if you get a cut, and the veins in your esophagus can get really big and can rupture.” [Read More]

Luckily though…

Science is on the path, if not for an absolute cure?

Then at least for a vaccine to prevent further spread of the epidemic.

[via Science Blog] A University of Alberta researcher and Canada Excellence Research Chair in Virology has made the

discovery of a vaccine that will potentially help combat hepatitis C. Michael Houghton, who led the team that discovered the hepatitis C virus in 1989, announced his findings at the Canada Excellence Research Chairs Summit in Vancouver this afternoon. Currently, there are no vaccines against the disease available.

Houghton, also the Li Ka Shing Chair in Virology at the University of Alberta, says the vaccine, developed from a single strain, has shown to be effective against all known strains of the virus. It took more than 10 years to develop and started while he was working for the drug company Novartis. Following previous vaccine tests funded by the National Institutes of Health that yielded promising results, he said there remained two critical questions.

“Did the recipients actually produce antibodies that could neutralize the actual infectious virus,” he said, “and if they could, how broad was the neutralizing response?”

The challenge, Houghton said, was that hepatitis C is more virulent than HIV, thus coming up with a vaccine that would neutralize the different strains around the world was believed to be impossible. Using a vaccine developed and tested on humans in his University of Alberta lab, Houghton and his co-investigator John Law discovered that the vaccine was capable of eliciting broad cross-neutralising antibodies against all the different major strains. Houghton says that this finding bodes good news for those with hep C and those who live or travel to areas where the disease is prevalent. [Read More]

This is definitely good news for the majority of humanities health prospects.

But for the minority?

I give you…

Ultimate Tazer Ball!

[via Weekly World News] Ultimate Tazer Ball allows players to zap opponents with stun guns.

Sport at its best is electrifying – but one new game takes the concept a little too literally by allowing players to tackle opponents by zapping them with stun guns.

Ultimate Tazer Ball allows  players to zap opponents with 300,000-volt stun guns, to induce a muscle spasm which will make them drop the ball or trip over.

There have been no official games played but the sport’s creators  insist it is genuine and claim they are planning to form a league.

Promotional videos have been seen by more than 1million viewers on YouTube.

The game’s US inventors say the stun guns are designed to deliver eight milliamps of current – well below the lethal dose of one amp but enough to test even the legendary ball skills of Barcelona’s  Lionel Messi.

In the video clip, one zapped player warns: “If you’re scared, don’t play.’ Another says: ‘It hurts, man, it doesn’t feel good.” [Read More]

Huh.

What can I say, when it comes to the health of a minority?

There is just no saving some people.

In other words?

Though a vaccine is in the works for Hep C…

There remains no cure for stupidity!

And that just sucks for the stupid people. (i.e. see Ultimate Tazer Ball video above)

bandwagon of terror app

Aporia Politico: When it comes to possible nuclear war, escaping to GJ 1214b? Viable option!

Riddle me this…

Who wins in a nuclear or a nuclear war?

Easy Answer: No one, NO ONE wins.

And yet…

Idiot countries just keep threatening it.

[via The Extinction ProtocolFebruary 18, 2012 – MOSCOW - Russia would use nuclear weapons in response to any imminent threat to its national security, Chief of the Russian General Staff Gen. Nikolai Makarov said on Wednesday.

“We are certainly not planning to fight against the whole of NATO,” Makarov said in an interview with the Ekho Moskvy radio, “but if there is a threat to the integrity of the Russian Federation, we have the right to use nuclear weapons, and we will.” The general said Russia’s nuclear deterrent is the cornerstone of strategic stability and serious efforts are being taken by the Russian government to modernize the country’s nuclear triad.

The Russian Defense ministry is planning to acquire at least 10 Borey class strategic nuclear submarines, thoroughly modernize its fleet of Tu-160 Blackjack and Tu-95 Bear strategic bombers, and equip its Strategic Missile Forces with formidable Yars mobile ballistic missile systems. Makarov also stressed the importance of maintaining highly-efficient, mobile conventional forces. “Unfortunately, we are facing threats from a number of unstable states, where no nuclear weapons but well-trained, strong and mobile Armed Forces are required to resolve any conflict situation,” Makarov said. –Rian  [Read More]

Jeez.

I just really need a plant of my own.

After all…

It seems like so many countries are jumping on the ‘Hey-lets-destroy-life-as-we-know-it-via-war-nuclear-weapons-and-general-unhappiness-because-we-know-we-suck-and-are-mad-you-dont’ bandwagon.

[via MSNBCTEHRAN, Iran — Iran would take pre-emptive action against its enemies if it felt its national interests were endangered, the deputy head of the Islamic Republic’s armed forces was quoted by a semi-official news agency as saying Tuesday.

“Our strategy now is that if we feel our enemies want to endanger Iran’s national interests, and want to decide to do that, we will act without waiting for their actions,” Mohammad Hejazi told the Fars news agency, NBC News reported.

Iran announced air defense war games to practice protecting nuclear and other sensitive sites, the latest in a series of military maneuvers viewed as a message to the West that Iran is prepared both to defend itself against an armed strike and to retaliate.

The U.S. and Israel have not ruled out military action against Iran’s nuclear program.

The official news agency IRNA said the four-day air defense war games, dubbed “Sarallah,” or “God’s Revenge,” were taking place in the south of the country and involve anti-aircraft batteries, radar, and warplanes.[Read More]

And that bandwagon?

Well…

It’s just broken & scary.

Want to know exactly HOW ‘broken & scary’?

Oh…

About THIS much.

[via Geekologie]NUKEMAP is a Google Maps application created by possible terrorist Alex Wellerstein [no, not really] to visualize the area affected if a nuclear bomb was dropped in your neighborhood.

You just choose the size of the atomic bomb you want to drop (or a historical preset), enter an address (or drag the nuke icon) and BOOOOOM, everything you’ve ever known and loved is dead. Unless you blew up New Jersey, in which case hopefully it’ll just break off and float out to sea.[Read More]

At this point?

Not pinning my hopes that any of the idiot countries, participating in all the war threats presently in the news, will have a drastic change of heart.

So instead…

Alien planet GJ 1214b seems like a completely viable alternative option.

The plant is proposed to be hot, wet and hey, I have flip-flops – So I’m all good!

When do we leave?

if you've got love in your sights

Where there is love, there is pain, love bites… But then so do I!

Love bites, love bleeds
It’s bringin’ me to my knees
Love lives, love dies
It’s no surprise
Love begs, love pleads
It’s what I need
~Def Leppard

[Source]

Where there is love, there is pain. ~Spanish proverb