Why soulmates and knowing some ‘inside and out’ not always a good thing!


Anguished Repose appreciates the thought of ‘soul-mates’ as much as the next person…

But even with that said, I must admit, this lady reveals some very valid points, because taking the choice, the opportunity to choose out of someone’s hand and putting it into the hands of fate?

Takes some of the sexy out:

[via Blogs.PublishersWeekly.com] Down with Destiny ~Rose Fox — August 30th, 2011

 

While going over my page proofs today (yes, on paper, with a pencil, because we are seriously old school over here), I caught the term “bond-mate” in two consecutive reviews. I took one out and replaced it with an equivalent term, but this got me thinking about how many paranormal romances seem to revolve around the idea of destined partners, much as fantasy epics often revolve around the idea of destined jobs or tasks.

Does anyone else find this idea really disturbing? It’s like all the worst parts of arranged marriage with none of the upsides. It throws us back to a time when women were property and there was no divorce. You can’t even blame your parents; Fate or Destiny or God has made the choice for you, and you don’t get to argue. Initially dislike the other person? Too bad! Fate or Destiny or God has also slipped you a roofie, and you will be so compellingly attracted to your destined mate that your arousal overwhelms your very reasonable concerns. The super-hot compulsive sex will just have to make up for your partner not being someone you otherwise want to be in the same room with.

In anything resembling the real world, this would be a recipe for marital disaster and profound self-loathing. The compulsive arousal/attraction thing particularly makes me cringe. There’s a word for sex you don’t want but are forced to have, and I think that word is applicable even when it’s Fate or Destiny or God forcing two people to behave a certain way rather than one of those people forcing the other. How terrible would it be to be repeatedly compelled to have sex with someone you’re bound to forever, possibly for multiple centuries or lifetimes depending on the paranormal setting, and to have your body aroused by it every single time even when it’s really not what your mind wants, and to know that you can’t escape because Fate or Destiny or God will inexorably draw the two of you back together no matter how far you run? Even if you loved your partner truly and deeply, how could you bring yourself to touch them, knowing that their responses aren’t under their control and that in this setting there is no such thing as consent because neither of you can really say no? [Read More]

Much like the romance is taken out if one truly knows someone “inside and out”, because really…

Is there ever a time when revealing ALL of what is inside you, is such a good thing?

[via New Scientist] This mouse embryo gets an all clear for fluorescent imaging thanks to Scale, a new solution that turns tissue transparent without distorting its shape. Developed by Atsushi Miyawaki of the RIKEN Brain Science Institute in Japan and colleagues, Scale could help researchers peer within tissues without destructive incisions.

After incubating the tissue in a concentrated urea solution for two weeks (right), the researchers could study the fine structure of the brain in 3D with the help of fluorescent markers. The images revealed neuronal connections and blood vessels deep within the embryo’s brain at new depths and sub-cellular resolution. The affordable experimental prep could help scientists probe a variety of other tissues and creatures clearly. [Read More]

Contextually that article is off my point, just a tad, but you get the picture.

Seriously…

People have layers for a reason, because there comes a point in a relationship where seeing literally everything about a person?

Kind of creepy.

You get the point, right?

There should be something said for people maintaining a bit of mystery in a relationship…

Where being decidedly LESS revealing can only be beneficial to both.

Not to mention a lot less nightmare inducing.

3 comments on “Why soulmates and knowing some ‘inside and out’ not always a good thing!

  1. Interesting blog and the theme. What I see that blogger has a problem with bad writing.
    I blame The Twilight series. To show the eternal love and soulmates/bond-mates the bad writers just go out of their way to rope the couple to the point of perversion. They should celebrate love and amazing feeling of meeting the other soul not to project the stereotypes. I think it could be done but people have such a strange ideas what love is and how to express it. I bet our souls knew when they meet the real thing. I am sure the real love is nurturing and soothing not pushing destiny on the other person. I think little more positivity would be great.
    Layers, thanks god for layers.You know what happens between two people only they know why they are attracted to each other.

    • I think the ‘soulmate’ claim is one made far too easily, with seldom any substance to back it up. For me, much like even the term “love” it has become cliche and trite thanks to popular culture. The world views such things today, in ways as I am pretty darn sure they were never meant to be viewed…And I must say that makes me very sad for both the original meanings, but most of all for us.

      • You are right, the term “love” and a soul-mate are different to different people. What love is? It has a different meaning for every person.
        What is soul? Like the meaning of life nobody can tell you what is meaning of love, you have to find for yourself. Or not.Then there are different type of love. But I am sure when it happens person can feel it without any doubts. It is attraction that never ends. In this time and age not so many people care about the romantic ideas about romantic love.

        Geez I forget the most important thing. The one who makes laugh is my soul mate. That is more important then anything else.

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