I have a heart on for St Longinus? No, but I will!


I used to wear a heart pendant in high school. Thanks to the wonderful maturity level of the boys I went to school with, seldom was the day that went by did I not hear, “Hey, nice hard-on…Oh, I mean, nice heart on.”

They were nothing if not consistent.

Long past though are the days in which a cutesy heart is a piece of jewelery I wear.

I generally stick to Saint medallions, because generally Saints are about as far from ‘cutesy’ as one can get.

Plus, I have an affinity for a good story, not to mention bad*ss*s such as this one:

St Longinus was a soldier in the Roman army, from Caesarea. He spent his life earning his pension by fighting with his fellow soldiers throughout the Roman lands, and eventually ended up in Jerusalem helping out with various tasks he was capable of (he was nearly blind). One of the tasks was to be life changing. St Longinus was instructed to assist at the crucifixion of Jesus. Being a good Roman soldier he took his work seriously and, ensuring that he get a promotion for doing a good job, stabbed Jesus in the side while he was on the cross. In other words, Longinus stabbed God. It takes a true badass to have the guts to do something like that.

Blood and water flowed out from the stab wound and some of it got in Longinus’ eyes. His blindness vanished and he declared “Indeed, this was the Son of God!” [Mark 15:39]. He immediately left the army, converted and became a monk. Not long after he was arrested for his faith, his teeth ripped out and tongue cut off. However, St. Longinus continued to speak clearly and managed to destroy several idols in the presence of the governor, who consequently had Longinus beheaded. His relics are now in the church of St Augustine, in Rome, and the lance he used to stab Jesus is contained in one of the four pillars over the altar in the Basilica of St Peter’s in Rome. [Read More]

I recently found a heart, however, at ThinkGeek.com that might make me reverse my stance on hearts. 1) Because it is SO not cute in the traditional sense and 2) A pewter anatomically correct heart pendant with pulsating drops of decorative red throbbing up the chain would blend well with all my Saints, would it not?

Right, so you can’t literally give your heart away. Well, you can, but that tends to work out best for both involved if you’re dead and there’s a medevac helicopter standing by. Love tends to work out best, on the other hand, if you’re both still amongst the living. So allow us to recommend this slightly-more-literal-than-a-cutesy-heart-but-not-as-literal-as-organ-donation option. Give your significant other your “heart” on a chain for safekeeping.

This pewter heart hangs from an 18″ braided sterling-silver plated chain. This is paired with a second sterling-silver plated decorative chain featuring garnet beads. Heart measures approximately 1 inch high and .75 inch across. Toggle closure. [Read More]

Fitting and just twistedly awesome enough for a rather bent sense of style.

What’s not to love about that?

6 comments on “I have a heart on for St Longinus? No, but I will!

  1. I am so used to the twists of bleeding hearts and blood dripping from the breaking hearts that didnt see what is the difference between these two hearts on .
    And then you put a story about bad ash saint and my computer got confused and froze . Bad moment for me. “laughs”
    You know what, I love this post .
    It is twisted and full of hearts . ;)

  2. Solid proof that all you need to do to get people to believe in you is let them stab your son, get his blood all over them, then allow them to miraculously heal by literally bathing in his blood. Next step? Sainthood, of course! How has God not employed this technique more often?!?

    Note: I would request that God not smite me for the sarcasm immediately preceding this. Thank You in advance.

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